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It's 1977 and Joseph Kerzer is just like any other Orthodox Jewish teenager; He wants an Italian goddess to adore him, he wants to win the Saturday Night Disco Contest and, with God's blessing, he wants to get laid.

Kerzer's Deli is a world unto itself, populated with the characters that make this story. Bubbie Dinke the most foul-mouthed seventy-five-year-old grandmother you've ever met. Leo Washington the black chef, Vietnam veteran and mentor of our hero Joseph Kerzer. Leo speaks Yiddish, makes a mean Matzo ball and is the heart of the Deli's staff.

Pearl Kerzer, an over bearing Mother with the balls of a bull. Hymie Kerzer, Joe's Dad and castrated daily by his wife. Golda Kerzer, Joe's sister with the angelic face and a dark secret. The pride of the Kerzer family is the older son Rabbi Y'Itzchak Kerzer a young Rabbi with a secret so dark and shocking that he could never become a member of the Republican Party.

Our hero Joe has issues. His family wants him to make something of his self, but he'd rather fantasize about being like his neighbor Tony Manero, the hippest, sexiest Italian Stud possible. Joe has Bertha Baumgartner stalking him and driving him crazy as she lusts after him. But Joe wants to escape to Tony's world, so risking the wrath and ridicule from a gang of Italian tough's (friends of Tony's) Joe and his friends venture down to Disco 3000.

Joe meets the girl of his dream Marie Antoinette and she seems to fall for him likewise. The two decide to compete in the local disco dance competition. Joe tells her that he's quite a dancer, an outright lie, and now he has to deliver the goods. When they kiss angels sing and Joe is changed forever.

Joe asks Leo for some help in learning how to dance and Leo sets him up with a meeting with Joe's childhood playmates, Leo's kid's, Karl and Martin who now have their own disco/jazz/ fusion band. Joe goes to Harlem for a lesson (no easy task for a white Jewish innocent). But the night goes off really well and Joe is now ready to start practicing with Marie.

Rehearsing with Marie has one serious down element. Her two brothers Lazlo and Nino are willing to kill to protect their sister's virtue and their interference is at times life threatening. Joe meets Marie's Mom, eats pork for the first time, and is introduced to a whole, strange, new world. But the rehearsals are both heavenly and clumsy as the two young adults enjoy each other's company.

The whole stew of Italians and Jews fighting for life, love and the pursuit of happiness culminates in a series of surprise twists and turns. Does Joe end up with Marie or Bertha? Does the Rabbi's surprise, surprise his best friend Father Frank? Is Joe's sister really a XXXXXXer? Who's the lucky girl in the lingerie that corners Joe? And who does Joe enter the contest with when Marie is hurt?

All these answers are available for those who read the script or eventually go see the movie. Shabbos Night Fever is not a satire of Saturday Night Fever. It is a story unto itself told in the style of such hit movies as MEET THE FOCKERS and MY BIG FAT GREEK WEDDING. It's wild, it's crazy, THE COMEDY IS SO WRONG IT'S RIGHT!

For a copy of the script in either PDF format or hard copy, contact Mark Riccardi at (818)-822-9690, or via e-mail at taketwoentertainment@yahoo.com.


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